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Five Reasons This Is The BEST Friday In A LONG time…

Y’all this is an amazing Friday. I’ve been a huge ball of nervous tension for about six weeks now. Today, is going to be a great day I can just tell. Here are five reasons why:

1.) My school listened to my concerns, heard me, worked with me and moved the WeeOne to a more structured classroom to give him the fresh start he needed. He’s going to end his year on a positive note, I can just tell.

2.) I’m going to wash that gray right out of my hair. I know that seems trite. But there is just something about coloring your hair that makes it all shiny and soft and less, well, gray.

3.) I walked the boys in to school today; everyone was in a fabulous mood. Everyone slept, including the mama. AND y’all get this. A girl stopped Big and gave him some dinosaur toys. I cried. I hugged her neck. I made him say thank you. She made my day. In this huge, significant way. I will remember this child fondly for the rest of my life.

4.) This weekend is a BIG one. My baby (well, she’s not really mine, but I love her like she is) has her wedding shower tomorrow. Literally, it feels like I was just at her high school graduation party. It has been my privilege to watch her grow into the amazing woman she is. Also, I’m going to my bazillionth Neil Diamond concert with my mama! “I am, I said.”

5.) My cousin sent me the most amazing photo from the Phoenix airport. She found SMILE Biscotti. Matt is a young adult living with autism who created a business to begin supporting himself. I cannot tell you how much hope this photo filled me with.

Life is good today my friends. Life is good.

xoxoxo K

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I wish I was the kind of girl who…

I wrote a facebook status that said: 

I wish I were the kind of person that could be trusted to wear white jeans. 

 That got me thinking about the kind of girl I wish I was. We’ll tackle that one first.  I wish I were the kind of girl that could be trusted to wear white jeans. I love white jeans. And white t-shirts. And white Oxford shirts. And white slipcovers. And white cabinetry. And…you get the drift. I would love a world where I was bathed in breezy white fabrics, but my reality is I can’t get out of the house without a stain of some sort on my brand new white shirt. Let’s be real, they only ever look good the one time.

I wish I were the kind of girl who could wear bangs. I know it’s dumb but it’s more an issue of im not a girl who’s good at fixing her hair. Maybe I could be but it’s that kind of hair that’s curly/not curly/not beachy waves but kinda like a cocker spaniels’ ears except not cute. It could be cute if I were the kind of girl who took time to fix my hair. But I’m not. Because whether I spend ten minutes or an hour, it looks the same after an hour of life in 98% humidity.

While we’re on the subject of completely ridiculous and vain issues, I wish I was the kind of girl who could wear high heels without feeling like I’m playing dress up in my mamas closet. I used to wear heels. A lot. Almost every day and I’ve got the shoe wardrobe to prove it, but then I quit working and I forgot how to walk in them. Yesterday, I wore a pair of wedges; reasonable wedges, even. I had to change shoes before ten am. When did this happen to me? Why? Am I cursed now to a life of sensible shoes?

I wish I were the kind of girl who could pull of sleeves. I don’t mean the ones on a cardigan; we have friends with tattoos. I love tattoos, but about the time I lost my ability to walk in anything but flip flops, I lost any muscle definition in my arms. That other kind of sleeve wouldn’t be pretty on me. So, cardis it is.

I wish I were the kind of girl who could wear her baby. Big and I went to Central Market today  (Think Whole Foods but contained to Texas) and there was a crunchy mama wearing her baby successfully while she peed. I’m talking about the wrap around sling thingy not one of those “easy” backpack wearing thingys. I wore big for approximately .5 seconds once when he was a newborn before he slid out a big ball of sweaty, mad baby whose mama barely caught him. I’m fairly certain that this mamas babes have never had a Rice Krispy Treat for breakfast or a McNugget; this leads me to my final point. 

I wish I was the kind of girl who is so zen that nothing gets to her. I’m also pretty sure that baby wearing mama is so zen that she’s never uttered a curse in front of them. To quote the great Ferris Bueller,  “Pardon my French but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you’d have a diamond.” Replace Kristi and her for Cameron and his and you’ve got an accurate description of the new state of my psyche and physiology. 

So, to recap, I want white pants, bangs, heels, sleeves a baby sling and zen. But what I’ve got is jeans, crazy hair, flip flops, cardis,  an SUV and yoga on Thursdays. I think I’ll be just fine.  

 

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World Autism Awareness and Acceptance Day 2015

Not long ago, I submitted a piece to The Mighty titled Diagnosis Day; you can read that here. In that blog, I talked about finding my people. Today, that is my prayer for my son.

More than almost anything, I hope my boy finds his people. The ones who accept him and love him unconditionally. The ones who don’t pity him. The ones who don’t merely tolerate him. I want him to find his people. The ones who think his love for animals is endearing. The ones who find his endless chatter about whatever topic that consumes him at the moment passionate not annoying. The ones who understand that if you need to cry, go ahead and cry.  That’s an honest way to live. I want my boy to find the ones who love his messy hair, his belly laugh that can fix any ails of the world, his lopsided grin when he’s thought something naughty. I want him to find his people. The ones who are proud to call him friend; because when he calls you friend, it’s for life. The ones who aren’t embarrassed by his social awkwardness, the ones who don’t care that he’ll never be one of the “cool kids” or the jocks. I pray that he finds his people. The ones who save him a spot at the lunch table, that help him navigate tricky social situations, that encourage him to keep being the amazing kid he is.

Big might not find his people until college or later, but I have no doubt that he will. He is a soul that is worth knowing and worth loving.IMG_0157

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Five Ways My Kids Amaze Me (The Good The Bad and The UGLY)

1.) Their growth. I don’t mean that in the “look how tall he’s gotten” way. I mean growth in character, depth, soul.

I often say “Through struggle comes growth.” These boys of mine, man, they are doing a lot of growing.  They each struggle in their own way. I wonder so many times if I’m failing them in this way or that, but all I have to do is look back and see their growth.

2.) Their capacity for love.

Holy cow. These boys. They love each other more than I could have ever conceived. Maybe it’s because I’m an only child and all siblings have this kind of ferocious love for one another. I don’t know. But these two are something special together.

3.) Their capacity for enciting comedy of errors.

My life is a lot of things. Boring is not one of them. I find I’m split between almost always on the verge of tears or maniacal laughter. I now make inappropriate jokes about calling the hit tv show “Pit Bulls and Parolees.” It’s a joke, people. I don’t mean it.

4.) Their capacity for empathy.

These boys. Their hearts are huge. They hurt for the world at large, they hurt for their friends, they hurt for each other.

5.) Their capacity to make me go prematurely grey.

For real. Stop. Can we have one crisis at a time, please? Oh, the answer is obviously no? So, who needs some growth now?

Happy Friday y’all!

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Five Things My Kids School Gets Right

I’m very often guilty of focusing on the negative. It’s a bad habit of mine. In light of that, today I want to give you five things my kids’ school does right.

1.) 99% of the teachers are wonderful and understanding and teaching for the right reasons.  They get that every kid has needs that are different from his or her peers.

2.) The nurses at my kids’ school are amazing caregivers. They care for kids with something as simple as a bump on the playground, dispense sometimes life saving medicines and are sometimes just a soft place to land on a hard day.

3.) The principals are not just authority figures to the kids. They know almost every child by name. Do they dole out punishments? You bet, but the kids seem to know that they are a grownup on their team.

4.) My kids have PE three days a week. While they don’t always like the games they play, it’s so vital when kids only get 15 minutes of recess a day, weather permitting, that they have this opportunity to MOVE their bodies.

5.) Our school psychologist is a lifesaver. I’m serious. She sees my kid weekly for social skills and various other needs that may pop up, she conducts ARDs (Similar to an IEP meeting) in such a way that it’s not so bad, she makes sure each kid she sees is prepared for changes the following year, she’s a go between for parents and teachers, she has a stack of paperwork a mile high on her desk yet has NEVER turned this mama away when she needs an ear. 

There are more than five things my kids’ school does right, certainly, but this is a good start. 

Happy Weekend Y’all.

#FiveOnFriday